i am a radical feminist, writer, and jewelry designer/maker who loves reading, collecting turquoise, and learning new languages.
Replace All Straight Men With Literally Anything Else 2014
I find this extremely offensive.. Jokingly or not. Not all men are assholes, you know.
Who left this tray of lasagna here
I was as privileged as they get. I was only beaten a few times. I was only held down and physically restrained perhaps a dozen times. I hated them anyway. I loathed them. I fantasize to this day about telling them how they made my skin crawl, how stupid they were, how revolting I found them, how pathetic it was that they sought me out because their wife wasn’t / wouldn’t (insert unfulfilled expectation of male privilege here). They still raped me bloody.
I can’t go to the bathroom without remembering the veterinarian who held me down by the back of my neck. He was old enough to be my grandfather. Most of them were. Most of them WERE grandfathers, the rest were fathers. One of them wrote to “the agency” to explicitly describe his fantasy of raping his teenage daughter’s best friend, and to see if I would participate in fulfilling it. (Even the man who ran “the agency” was disgusted. I told him I’d sooner call the cops – and that I was able to say “no” is truly privilege amongst whores.)
I can count the times my boyfriend and my pimo let me say no on one hand. But technically, I got to do so. THAT is privilege. Usually, whores who say no just get beaten by men a little extra, and raped either way.
These memories make me avoid the privileged fools who insist it’s “free choice.” I got paid as much or more than them. I was a “high dollar hottie,” guaranteed drug- disease- and drama-free. That means I don’t have herpes (yet? or obviously?) which implied I don’t have hep C or HIV. It means my boyfriend won’t burst in and rob him, or beat me, or both. It means the agency won’t try to blackmail him or upsell.
There was no freedom in my “choice.”
I used to sit on my bed and sob and beg not to. I was young, and looked younger. They liked that. Nice and shaved. They liked to play out fantasies that I was the drunk teenager next door. All I had to do was smile and blink slowly and fake giggle and try to stay relaxed (tensing makes it hurt even worse than it already does) and concentrate on imagining the ocean.
I’d never even seen the ocean but I imagined it – waves crashing, seagulls, warm air. Pretending the taste of tears and blood was sea salt. The first thing I learned was how to cry without getting caught or fucking up my mascara. Jacqueline Homan (via yoursocialconstructsareshowing)
Responding to her middle school’s ban on shorts, leggings and yoga pants for girls.
The first rule of misogyny is that women and girls are responsible for what men and boys do. It is part of all childrens basic conditioning in most societies.
Will men ever be able to give a shit about sexual assault against women without referring to us as their sisters and daughters?? Stay tuned to find out if men are capable of empathy that doesn’t prioritize themselves!
Gavin De Becker (via elliesigh)
REMINDER THAT ‘THE GIFT OF FEAR’ IS A TREASURE WRITTEN BY A SURVIVOR OF CHILD ABUSE AND FAMILY VIOLENCE AND YOU SHOUKD READ IT